Five Worst Albums of 2010.

These albums sucked. I'm sorry. If you liked any of these that's fine, you're entitled to your opinion (you're wrong though). Listen to better music than the shit that Pitchfork/NPR/CBC Radio 3 doesn't inappropriately touch itself for.

#1 Vampire Weekend - Contra

XL Recordings

I hate this band even more than in January. Now that yuppies the world-over have digested this band of rich kids, saw the band settle with the woman (then a doe-eyed teen) of the photo they used without permission and their songs are used in car commercials, it just shows you the depths of evil that this band is capable of. I don't have any proof, but I think that this band is a ploy by the global corporate oligarchy of the right to further castrate the ineffectual liberal elite.

"Yay Obama, Vampire Weekend and Starbucks! Let's buy smart cars and ignore real global economic and social inequalities! I love being a member to the CREATIVE CLASS! and thinking that Contra is the best!"

FUCK. THIS. BAND.

#2 The Brian Jonestown Massacre - Who Killed Sgt. Pepper?

A [Records]

Blaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh. Sucks. Man this band used to be so good. Too many drugs Anton. Tisk. Tisk. Tisk. All the songs on this album are twice as long as they need to be. That makes it so fucking B-O-R-I-N-G. And that song that rips off the Joy Devision riff really put a crinkle in my sheet.

Oh and WTF is up with that album cover? It's so incredibly bad. If I were to do a worse album covers of the year list this might take #2 after the Yeasayer album cover. I mean how can cheesy can you get? Jesus in fucking 3D? Fuck me that's really fucking bad.

#3 The Walkmen - Lisbon

Fat Possum Records

Holy shit I did not like this. It actually made me depressed it was so bad. I was wicked stressed with school and put this on while working and my mood actually turned south. I was thinking to myself when the first song came on "Oh man this is bad. I sure have a lot of work to do." By the mid-point of the album is was like "Oh dear lord this is B-A-D. I'm not really sure if my thesis is worth it... Oh hum... Why did I do this stupid thing? Wow this song sucks." Towards the end of the album I was thinking, "OH DEAR LORD I HATE MY LIFE! WHY DID I EVER GET INTO SO MUCH FUCKING DEBT FOR THIS STUPID STUPID THESIS?!?!! THIS ALBUM IS REALLY REALLY REALLY BAD!" I then sank my head down and left school and crawled into bed. After waking up the next day, head cleared and refreshed, I thought to myself, "What was I thinking last night? My thesis is awesome. Hmmmmm.... It must of been that shitty Walkmen album." I then went back to school listened to it again and I lo-and-behold I started to feel the same way. At that point I deleted it from my computer and this guy finished his thesis, and it was awesome. Fuck you Walkmen, you're not going to drag me down.

#4 Jónsi - Go

XL Recordings

I've written about this album before so you can read more here. I know some people like this but I'm a human not an elf. Elves would like this music. That's rad and all. But I'm not an elf. I don't live on a mystical island of fire and ice, trolls, unicorns and grumpy old witches of the underworld. JUST NOT THAT INTO IT. SORRY.

#5 Sightings - City of Straw

Jagjaguwar Records

See I love noise. I know it's not something that everyone can dig. But I really enjoy it when it works. The subtle fragments of music, sound collages and electronic chaos can really be composed in such a way that truly amazing soundscapes are created. ----OR---- It can be a bunch of over-privalleged dudes in Brooklyn that can afford to fuck around in a studio and call it noise and a respectable indie label like Jagjaguwar can pick it up and release it. This album falls into the former category. Bullshit noise is worst.